Saturday, August 29, 2020

To the bridge builders out there. . .

I'm back. 

I mean, I'm going to try it. I have numerous concerns about blogging again. In this world of pointing fingers and divisive speech, I'm afraid to speak. My fear to share exists because what I want most in the world is to cultivate harmony and unity, love and compassion for ourselves, each other, and the world. I get a lump in my throat just thinking about it. I've kept quiet, in my attempt to keep from further irritating the chafed sensibilities of this world.

But, while stuck inside during these pandemic months, the itch to write again is winning out. It seems this is the only way I know how to process by thoughts. So, here it goes.

I am hurting. I see a world shrouded in anger and fear these days. Especially here in the US. But, everywhere. Individualism and communalism are shaking fists at each other, and for someone like me, that is very, very uncomfortable. How can we live in a world where everyone thinks the "other half" is crazy and deluded? How does that serve us or foster meaningful existence?

Right now I see rational and loving individuals grasping at making their lives meaningful by demonizing those who disagree with them. I see value signaling at every turn and a good, old-fashioned US vs THEM approach to living this life. As a bridge builder, this is very disconcerting. Sometimes I think it would be easier to be "on a side" and just brush off the opposing view with a flick of the wrist. But, that isn't how I operate. Disagreement isn't the problem as much as disrespect is. We don't play by the same rules for discourse, and it seems we are all too happy to win arguments on a technicality-- as long as we win. 

It is a tragic way to get through life. 

What amazes me most is that most people from both sides say they are willing to engage in civil conversation about these issues with anyone from any background. Yet. . . that isn't happening. Why? 

It is a tangle of shifting standards, self-delusion, and conditional responses. In our attempt to cope with this strange and painful time of social distress, political unrest, and economic crisis, we may be forgetting that integrity in our actions, thoughts and speech is the only salve. And most of all, can we come from a heart-centered presence instead of head-centered tactics? 

I propose that when we encounter a contrary stance to our views, that we take a moment to sit with our reaction and the discomfort of disagreement. Recognize how hard it is to disagree without taking the disagreement personally. It is so hard!! Can we sit with each other's pain and fear? 

And, let's take a step back to the place we can agree.  

  • We are human. 
  • We have inherent integrity as beings on this planet. 
  • We are afraid for ourselves and our loved ones.
  • We are doing our best, and we make mistakes.

Can we sit together with these truths? 

I am heartbroken over the state of the US right now. I am heartbroken for the deterioration of the fabric of our communities over fear. I am heartbroken for the loss of healing rituals and safe spaces. I am heartbroken that we are now separated by masks and 6 feet of emptiness when we need comfort and communion to fill our basic need for safety and recognition as humans.

We have woven a web of life conditions that is too complicated to unravel without generating knot after knot in the process.  What are we willing to let go of to untangle this mess? 

Knots of hatred can only be undone through the release of fear and the trust in forgiveness. How can we forgive ourselves and each other? 

For anyone out there who feels caught in the middle. . . who hears it from both sides. . .  and who feels alone. Please know that you are not. There are still bridge builders in the world. There are still people who believe in human resilience and the grace of integrity. I'm not exactly sure what the next steps are, but sharing my voice in this way seemed to be the next step for me. To put something out in the world that embraces our human frailty and reminds us of our shared nature. 

May you feel seen, heard, and honored. 

May you release the fear and anger pent up inside of you. 

May you find ways to honor yourself and others through your vulnerability and resilience. 

May you be peace. 

-Beth



 


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