Spirit of Learning (Recent thoughts on Education)

(I wrote this for my students but it certainly applies to all of life.)

Go! Do! Be More! Faster! Harder! Aaaaaaah!

It seems the world is pushing us to hurry up and . . . what?  . . . be successful?
What does that even mean?

I have been reading a very interesting book called The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F---K, by Mark Manson. Despite its punchy title, it is a powerful little book that puts into perspective what it is we are here to do in this lifetime and what really matters. I highly recommend it.

The reason I bring it up is that I have found recently that many students have forgotten what it really means to get an education. News Flash: Education is not merely preparing to have a job.  If you are well educated it is more likely you will get a job, but education does not have the explicit goal of getting you a job. Training will get you a job. Education will give you quality of life. 

The Spirit of Learning is the spirit of real education. And, that is what I am most interested in as a teacher, as a human!.  What is the bigger picture here? So, when you submit an assignment (as crazy making as it can seem) it is not about the length, it is not about the number of sentences, words, characters. Everything you turn in for credit is an opportunity to show me that you are putting in the time to investigate the content of the course and most importantly how it changes you, your views, your appreciation. your world! This is the stuff that will enrich your life and make it meaningful.
Counting points to get that A (or B or C) will only torment you. That is not the spirit of learning.
I promise that if you do your best to communicate the spirit of your learning in each and every assignment the grade will follow. Because you will actually be learning.

Things that require you to work hard are thing worth having. Freebies are transient and disposable.  They may make you happy in the short term, but they will not make you happy in the long term.

Give yourself a chance to enjoy your education.

3 Tips for the Spirit of Learning

Ask yourself:
1. "What is the goal of this assignment?" "Why would my teacher assign it to me?" Answer those question within your submission.

2. "How am I representing myself in my work?" "Do I express that I learned something from the assigned reading?" "Do I honor the process with full sentences and grammar?" Ensure your submission reflects your mature thinking and values.

3. "Is there a way I could actually make this FUN?" That doesn't mean you have to spend MORE time on the assignment, it is about your ability to enjoy the challenge and/or process while you are working. (In fact it might actually take you less time working this way. . . just sayin')

Losing the Illusion

I often fall prey to comparison.  And, not in a healthy way.  Because I do many different things, my time is divided. Because, of the split focus, I often feel I should go deeper into each aspect of my work.  I often wish I could/would spend more time on my choreography, on my lesson plans, on my writing, on my advocacy. So, when I see others who devote themselves entirely to one thing with great success, I feel like my attempts are somewhat pathetic in comparison.  But, that is changing, slowly.

And, it is changing because I am realizing how others do the same thing with me.  In a recent blog I wrote about the student who asked how I manage to have so much energy.  I explained to her that I don't! The same week in a CFR class a fellow classmate described her impression of me being totally relaxed and comfortable, when in fact I was hugely uncomfortable and working really hard at the time.  I am beginning to understand that others are elevating me in the same way that I have often elevated others.

And, I won't stand for it!

This misperception leads to too much suffering! It seems most everyone imagines that everyone else is happier, healthier, more balanced, more relaxed, smarter, more talented, more creative, blah, blah blah.

We can't ever know someone else's experience.  And, even if we did. It ultimately doesn't matter, because we only live in this body, in this experience, in this time and place.  And, if we let it, we can feel the richness of our lives, full and vibrant in every moment (including the crummy ones).  Full is full.  And, we are full just as we are.

In this moment, doing whatever it is we are doing, we are full if we are fully present.  Our experience can't exist on a good or bad continuum, because that devalues our whole self, which is forever rich and complex.  If we can truly let go of our desire to know what is outside of ourselves and instead become fully occupied with what is inside of us, we have a chance at dissolving the illusions that cause us suffering.

We don't have to believe that there is always a "better" way.  What if there was just "this" way?  Then when we are tired, we are just tired. We don't have to try to be like that energetic person we see beside us.  Then, when we are struggling we are just struggling.  We don't have to wonder how that person can always smile all the time.  And, when we own our experiences fully then we get to experience the sweet moments just as fully.  When we are joyful, we are free to be joyful.  When we relaxed, we are free to be relaxed.  There is no illusion of the other being better.  Because there is no other than our current experience. The present moment is all that will ever be real.  The present moment is both fleeting and eternal.  The rest is smoke and mirrors.

Beth

About the Back. . .

I found myself this morning curled up on the couch, face buried in surrounding pillows and blankets and back seizing. Again.

In that moment, I wanted nothing more than to be unconscious. I wanted to leave the waking realm so that I could forego the pain and patience for healing my lower back.  A familiar and recurrent injury. This was nothing new and after a week of "staying positive" I had had enough. I wanted to run and punch someone, throw a fit and smash furniture (or walls if I could).  I wanted the relentless ache and radiating pain to go away! I wanted to shout it out of my life. For good.

This was all happing within a hour of my dance company rehearsal.  In less than an hour, I was going to have to be presentable to the world and a helpful leader to the group.  But, at that moment, I was paralyzed with frustration and hurt.  Hurt due to the actual pain, but hurt also from the psychological toll being injured takes on a "mover."

Being sedentary for the last two days wasn't helping my mood either. I had been laid up sleeping on and off for two days.  I realize now just how sensitive my brain chemistry is.  It seems I can't go more than a day without physical activity of some sort.  It is funny, because I think it is ok at the time, in fact in the moment I like the feeling of "resting," but after two days, I am melancholy at best and flat out depressed at worst.  Today I was experiencing the worst.

Injury and depression mix a dangerous cocktail.

And, I have been drinking it non stop all weekend.  The weekend planned for recovery turned into a weekend of downward spiraling.  No need for chemical enhancers, I can do this all on my own. So, curled into a ball, face pressed into the back couch cushions, I had to act.  I had to change something. I asked my rock solid husband to take a walk with me.  The moment I got outside the tears came.  The walk was a little aggravating for my back, but the reality of why I was upset was more painful than the physical discomfort.  I realized that when I wanted to run and punch someone, I was wanting to run and punch myself.  In that moment I believed that I had hurt my back, that it was my fault it had gone out again. Even if that was true, I see now that I don't deserve punishment. I have already punished myself enough.  I'm injured for heaven's sake!

I am already hurting so why am I trying to hurt and hate myself more?

I wanted this post to be something different. I wanted it to be sarcastic and funny.  To entertain you with my misfortune and pain.  But, unfortunately I'm still a little too raw for that, and I've decided that this is not something to joke about; it needs deeper compassion and forgiveness than that.

If you have back pain, have had back pain or ever have back pain in the future.  Please remember this:

You are not the cause, you are not the problem, you are not insufficient, you are not cursed. You are not the pain, you are not the injury, you are not this experience.  You will heal, you will recover, you will move freely and without inhibition again. You are lovable, you are worthy of being healthy and happy, you are just fine-- just the way you are.  Life's details of pain and suffering can feel so real, but your essence goes beyond all of this.  You --as you are in this very moment-- are everything you need to be.